When Batman and Hellboy are no help, call on Dora and Diego. Ayuda me!

(disclaimer:  No children were adopted in the making of this story.  I did not become the Angelina Jolie of our local movie theatre, though I did come this close to donning my Tomb Raider outfit and kicking some ass.)

Last night I ditched out and went to a movie.  Just about as frequently as I ditch out on the readers of this blog, I ditch out on my family.  I may be a 31 year old mother of two in Mississippi, but I still have a pulse and sometimes I need that pulse to not be matched by the beating pulses of so many that share my DNA.

I should develop some kind of code to indicate that I am heading out, will be back later, and not to come looking for me unless you see the bat signal.

Yeah, I went to see The Dark Knight.

Now for the trite:  Christian Bale was stellar.  The entire time I was watching him appear out of nowhere to save the day and the girl and the city, I totally had "I Need a Hero" playing in my head.  Who doesn't love to be saved?

Heath Ledger.   I am such a sucker.   Count me in for all of the glowing reviews of his performance.  He was breathtaking and, sure, I felt an impulse to perform the sign of the cross when he first took the screen.  My ability to suspend my disbelief and be consumed by a performance is second to none. 

I don't write movie reviews so much as I write obsessive stalker notes. 

The Dark Knight was amazing, engaging, engrossing, and inspiring.  Yep, I just fell all over myself and gushed "inspiring."  The message in this film was precise and clear:  You sometimes have to be the fall-guy in order to be the truest hero.  The Dark Knight was an exercise in altruism and it was fascinating.

Go see it.  The end.

The showtime I caught was the last showing of the night, so it was after midnight as I made it out of the theatre.  I took the side exit directly into the parking lot, one of those exits that is at the end of a corridor of theatres.  As I was pushing through the exit, I stopped to listen to the movie still playing in the last theatre by the door.  It was incredibly loud and sounded painfully violent, so naturally I had to poke my head in. 

A trip to the movies would not be complete for me unless I stole at least 15 minutes of another movie.  Because screw you, Ben Affleck.

The signs above the entrance doors indicated that the movie was either WALL-E or Hellboy II:  The Golden Army.  By the sound of the screaming, I put my money on Hellboy.  Or technically, not my money.

It was one of those smaller screening rooms where you walk up a long straight passage bordered on one side by a high wall blocking the view of the stadium seats.  A 31 year old mother on the run could stand in that passage and watch a movie without being seen by the people in the seats.

So could a small child huddled under a blanket on the floor.

In the soft red light of the floor runners in the dark passage, a young boy sat, knees drawn up in front of him, fleece Spider-Man blanket wrapped around his small body and over his head so that only his face peeked out, with eyes wide and fixed on the screen ahead of us.

He couldn't have been more than four.

Welcome to hell, boy...  you should not be here.

I walked slowly toward him, stopping in view of the screen but perhaps four feet from where he sat.  He looked up and I smiled and shrugged, indicating that "Yeah, I'm sneaking a movie, too."  He quickly averted his eyes and leaned away from me a little.

But then he looked back.  And then again.  And again.  Until he lowered his blanket behind his head just a little.

I gently sat down on the slanting floor beside him, close enough to be able to whisper to him if I leaned in but not so close that I could intimidate him with my presence or even appear as though I was with him to a certainly soon-to-check-in mother rounding the wall.

Minutes passed and no mother checked in on him.  Was his guardian sitting on the other side of that wall?  Why weren't they checking on him?  Were they that selfish about their movie viewing habits that they didn't care that he was clearly scared?  Not to mention that it was now close to 12:30 at night.

Judging whoever had allowed him to be here was not going to get me anywhere and I couldn't exactly take him out of there, so I just watched the movie.  With him.  Stealing glances at him every now and then to gauge how frightened he was by the epic battle playing out on the screen above us.

He was indeed small.  Delicate frame and fine black hair.  Dark skin and dark eyes.  Surely Mexican.  Ever since Hurricane Katrina, the Mexican population along the Gulf Coast has exploded.  He would poke his feet out from under his blanket every once in a while and reveal his little plastic sandals, but nothing more.

He stole a glance at me and smiled.  I leaned over and whispered, "Wow, this is a scary movie, but she is really pretty, huh?"  He smiled but said nothing.

"Hey, is your mom here?"

Nothing.

"Wow, he's really a crazy guy!"

Small nod.

"Ew, that's gross.  Yuck, huh?"

Smile.  Roll of the eyes.

We watch the movie.   We watch Hellboy.

I moved my wallet near the wall, my drink beside me, and stretched my legs out in front of me.  Indicating that I was in this for the long haul, too.

When he would look at me, I would try to give him a reassuring smile and sort of shrug in a "this is crazy, right?" kind of way, but I could never tell if what felt like reassuring on my face was actually coming off as creepy Stranger Danger in his eyes. 

And then he laid down on the floor and rolled around.  Shooting me smiles and giggling.

The puppy had revealed his belly.

So there we sat, in a dark passage with frightening images of demon spawn towering over us, and we finished watching the movie.

The lights came up, a few people straggled out, and I gave each and every one of them a look that screamed, "I'm just keeping your kid company, you bastard.  No wait, your kid.  No.  Oh.  Okay, your kid."

I am Bruce Wayne about to turn into Batman.  Someone is going answer to this.

And then I ran out of bastards.

I looked at my little friend and smiled.  He hadn't said a word.  Finally, he stood up, draped his blanket over his head and face, and went barreling down the passage with me pulling up the rear, without a clue what to do next.  I expected him to keep barreling toward the concession stand or some room where his theatre-employee parent was surely waiting, but instead he flopped on the floor outside of the theatre doors.

Okay, so, um, huh.

In the light of the hallway, our situation began to feel ridiculous. 

"So, is your mom here?"

Mumble.

"Ah, do you speak English?"

Mumble.  Smile.

Grasping at my high school Spanish, "Habla Español?"

"Sí."

"Hmmm, is your mami aquí?  Aquí?  (insert hand motion indicating the floor)  Aquí?"

Good Lord, I was now pulling from old episodes of The Bob Newhart Show.

Giggling.

"Are you three?  Tres?"  I hold up three fingers.  I'm thinking Dora the Explorer now.  Keep it simple.

Nods.  Laughs.  Says something that I'm pretty sure means "crazy white lady" in Spanish.

By the twinkle in his eye as he says it, I'm almost sure this is not something I would have learned on Diego.

Maybe five minutes have passed and not a soul has walked by and my friend is still rolling around on the floor.

Do I turn him in to the lost and found?  Do I bust whoever it is that must be working here and using these movies as babysitters?  It is well after midnight and this movie was not, in fact, WALL-E.

And then, like a bizarre scene from a movie that I did not audition for, small Mexican children begin simultaneously exiting the theatres around us.  Three of them from three different theatres and they are all headed our way.

Ayuda me!  Please tell me one of them speaks English.

They all smile and lift their eyebrows.  I am on a stage and my audience awaits my first line.

"So, um, I found him in Hellboy.  I couldn't just leave him there because, well...  so I just watched it with him."

The oldest girl speaks.  "Yep, he always thinks that movie is WALL-E.  (motioning to my friend in the Spider-Man blanket on the floor) Tell the lady thank you."

Mumbles something that again sounds suspiciously like Spanish for "crazy white lady."

An embarrassed look passes his apparent sister's face and she nudges him with her foot and shushes him quickly.  Ah, I knew it! 

"Sorry, he's, uh, saying ugly words."

Yes, I know. 

So much for my stint as the Dora-educated Hellboy-watching Dark Knight of the movie theatre.  With great power comes great responsibility.  And almost uniformly no great respect or gratitude from the citizens of Gotham.

 

Dios mio.

~~~

To you, I ask:  From the moment you saw him to the moment you left him, what would you have done?

~~~

...........................

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Comments

[rachel]

ummm. the same thing you did. I would have sat there with him and then tried to find out where his parent or guardian was.
What the hell are those kids doing there by themselves, that late, at that movie?
There's something seriously wrong there, not the least of which is the 3 year saying bad things to you in Spanish or otherwise.

Yikes.
I am dying to see Dark Knight! DYING!! do you hear me!!!!

[Jessica (aka Rose from It's my life...)]

Who are these kids? Where do they live that they hide in the theater all night and know what movies are where?
I would have done what you did, sat with him and waited for someone to collect him. What an odd situation!

[jen]

this makes me want to weep.

i'd have done what you did, but probably not quite so patiently. what else goes on in this little boy's life, it's tragic.

you are a good egg, M.

[Miss Britt]

My God, Meagan. I probably would have walked away.

Thank you for being someone who didn't.

[Mary Beth]

Little did you know when you went to the movies that you would fall into a group of underground children that live in the movie theater, much like The Mixed Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler. Otherwise, what were those kids doing there? He definitely seemed to have the situation in hand.

[Amie]

That late at night, I'd like to think I'd do what you did, but I know my patience levels would have knocked that idea right out of my head. Most likely, I'd go get the theater management.

Still, you did an unbelievably good deed.

[Maria]

"The Dark Knight was an exercise in altruism and it was fascinating."

Exactly.

[MommyTime]

I would have done exactly what you did. Only I am a busybody, so I would have probably gotten a bit insistent with the oldest child and/or trotted them over to the management to find out where the parents were. "What on earth are little kids doing at the movies at midnight?" is not really my business, but I could see my way to making "Why is this four year old watching an R movie alone?" my business. Not that such pushiness would have helped. But I get all self-important when I don the supermom cape. (I did once chase a toddler halfway across an enormous park when he left the water-spray area where no one had been watching him for a good half hour and thus no one saw him leave; I muttered a few choice snide sentences about no one paying attention to him when I carried him back and finally located his ostensibly worried mother. I know. I'm not a very forgiving person. But this child wasn't even old enough to talk. Just call me la gringa loca.)

[Lori]

I would have done the same thing; and then dropped by Management's office with all of those kids in tow and yelled..."What the...is this world coming to?"

[Katie]

I would have sat with him...after calling the authorities. I can't believe that someone would either A) allow their children to be out so late at such violent movies or B) be so out of touch that their kids can run out to a movie without them knowing. The thought has entered my mind that these children possibly belonged to someone on staff at the theater, but that STILL doesn't excuse letting them sit in a movie like that. Just my two cents...

[Veronica @ Toddled Dredge]

This is one of the reasons I don't go to some theaters anymore. I don't see many 3YOs unattended, but I see many sitting in rated R movies with their irresponsible parents. It really makes my blood boil.

[Lori]

Wow! I probably would've sat with him, but then taken him to management when the movie was over. I can't even imagine. I don't let my 13yo go to the movies without an adult yet!

[TX Poppet]

I worked at a movie theater when I was a teenager. They had a protocol for this. I'd have alerted the theater manager on duty and then asked what they were going to do about it. No answer? Call the police. It's all about the children, not about playing nice with the parents.

[Honeybell]

WOW. Heartbreaking. I like to think I would have done the same thing you did, but chances are, I would have left him there and gone to find management.

[Lilacspecs]

We went and saw Dark Knight as soon as it came out here in Gent. It was amazing although (please don't hurt me) I thought LEdger's rendition of the Joker was too snivvling and animal like. His dialogue was fantastic but his mannerisms I don't think, fit the part like I thought. Otherwise, it was stellar!
And had it been me, I'd have immediately taken the little boy to the manager's office. You just never know and a child alone that late at night could be a risk to you, or him or both of you.
But I worked in daycare and hours of safety training have made me more suspicious and neurotic than most people.

[Megan]

This is more fascinating than The Dark Knight. Some of you would have left him alone, some of you would have gone for management, some of you would have taken him to management.

Some of you think that the kids were in the theatre alone. Some of you think they must have been there with a parent. Some of you think that parent probably worked there.

Some of you think I did the right thing. Some think I did more than you would have done. Some think I didn't do enough. And I'm thinking some of you think I was all wrong.

Welcome to my night last night. I was each and every one of you at one point or another.

And I'm still lost. Keep the comments coming. I feel like I'm still there on the floor racking my brain for what the right thing to do is. And none of you has suggested one of the moral dilemmas that I considered the most.

[Anissa@Hope4Peyton]

I gotta go with the idea that I probably have called the theatre management in to find this boy a grown up with matching DNA. Because if my 3 year old wandered away from me long enough to watch a movie, you'd be pretty right in guessing that the FBI jackets would be showing up PDQ.

But I would also like to think that if my child did wander away, a nice adult would take the time to help them without being uber-creepy.

[T with Honey]

Did you not turn him in because you would have had to explain why you were watching Hellboy but did not purchase a ticket for it? Because that would be one of the reasons I would have been more conflicted if I were in your position last night.

Upon seeing him I would have waited about 5 minutes to see if a parent or someone showed up looking for him At that point I want to do something. I'd always wonder if he was OK or if someone lacking scruples had found him had I walked away. So leaving him there by himself was not an option.
Luckily I know enough Spanish to have talked with him. But let's say that it was Chinese instead. Then I would have had no way of communicating with him.
I believe I would have found someone that works in the theater and explained that I poked my head in and saw the boy sitting there and HE SHOULD NOT BE SITTING AT AN R-RATED MOVIE BY HIMSELF THIS LATE AT NIGHT HELP ME FIND A PARENT.
Why wouldn't I wait till the end of the movie? Well, in the world of today then I set myself up for trouble. There is always a chance the kid could decide to fake that I attacked him. Best to quickly find an employee and have witness around.

Then I would have stuck around until either a guardian/parent or the police showed up. It would have been a long, long night but any other way and I would have been plagued by wondering what if for an even longer time.

[blogversary]

Wow. I would have talked to theatre management and if they gave me the run around called the company.

Sad. All around.

[Queen of Shake Shake]

After my intervention stunt today at Chick Fil A, I'm all high on myself and I would have totally done something about it, like yelling at people and demanding employees DO something to locate the parents.

I don't care what country you are from, you don't leave a three year old to wander the movies at will. WTF?

[CharmingDriver]

I would have done the same thing; there is no way I could have left him there alone on the floor with his blanket. The whole thing just makes me angry (which, thanks white guilt, also makes me feel horribly judgmental because I am WELL AWARE of the new demographics on the Coast and it's not a new class of wealth moving in, even compared to where the influx is generally coming from, sadly) and very, very sad.

[JessicaAPISS]

It's the air conditioning. I grew up on the Mexican border in a desert where it is very hot and families can be very poor. Sometimes it is an act of mercy to give the children money to go to the movies. The little ones' tickets are free, the older ones cost less than adults. The adults save their money and allow the kids to go in, while they hang out outside.

It's not perfect, and a zillion bad things could happen, and the older kids should be supervising the younger ones, but the intent is humane. In a life without central air in the extreme heat, and maybe a lot of people are packed into a small space, going to the cold movies where one needs a blanket can be heaven.

That said, I would have done the exact same thing Megan. There are too many cuckoo crazies out there to leave a little one all alone. But I think you were right not to call the police or CPS.

That's my .02 - Jess

[Kat - Sassy Irish Lassie]

I too would have never left him alone on the floor. hough I also think I would have gone to security or someone who worked there. No three year old should see Hell Boy 2. Can you imagine the nightmares that poor little darling is going to have :(

And I agree with Jessica - you ARE a good egg!!

[mojavi at Simple Things]

yeah I would of done the same thing but I would of talked to the manager to. That is dangerous. Replace you with a pedophile and that kid is gone!

[Jennifer, Playgroups are no place for children]

What the hell?? Very odd, not to mention dangerous, letting some little kid out sight in a movie theatre.

I would have done the same thing as you, complete with the bewilderment (is that even A WORD?). Had nobody come for him, I guess I'd have taken him to management.

[Laura Iriarte]

wow megan! that's crazy! yes i would have done the same thing you did. stayed with him, waited for parents. then what can you do, his family, very irresponsible though they are, are his family.

~Laura/aka lauralovesart

[Wendy]

It's hard to know what to do when you don't know what you just walked into. I don't know that I'd get authority involved either when you are guessing the parents may not be here legally, in the country (forget about in the theater).

[Christina]

Having never been in that situation, I can't be sure what I'd do. But my first gut instinct after learning there were no parents with him was to march right up to management and inform them that they're letting children in to see R rated movies without an adult, which is illegal, and suggest that maybe they need to be reported to make them work at enforcing the safety standards that have been set.

Perhaps that would make them a little more diligent at checking who is in each theater. Of course, I also have to wonder what those kids would be doing if they weren't hiding out in a movie theater all night. It's possible they'd be in a worse situation. Sad all around - there are no good answers.

[Natalie]

See, in my neck of the woods, the super anal theater police would have zoned in on that child long before you ever got there.

I think you did the right thing. I don't know what I would have done, but I probably would have wigged out and gone to the management.

I loved The Dark Knight, it is one of the best movies I've seen in a while. Definitely takes the cake for Superhero movies (sorry, Ironman).

[Channah @ Get a Grip, Mom!]

Wow, I think I would have got the theater management and the police involved - where were the parents?
You are a very good person to have waited there with him. Brava.

[Michelle Lamar]

On a completely shallow note, am I the only one that would "DO" Batman in a mall with my parents watching? Maybe it's just me. You love how much of a rockstar you are Megan, so just had to chime in with a trashy comment. You're so glad you know me right?

[Dorothy Stahlnecker]

Megan, this is so awful..I think I would have done what you did...and further like you been sick to my stomach..sometimes I hate this world. And it'll never be better..

Hugs.. Dorothy from grammology
grammology.com

[Ellie]

Apropos of not this blog post at all, love your comments over on blurbomat.com. Thanks for speaking out so articulately.

[Jen @ blissfullycaffeinated]

I lurk on your comments a lot, but had to say something because you've touched a nerve.

While Jess made a really good point about the air conditioning situation, I am always infuriated when people bring their kids to innapropriate movies late at night.

(Letting your tiny kids go there alone is something I did not imagine could happen, and I probably would have gone to the manager. But you did the right thing. Made sure he was OK, and let him go with his siblings.)

We were in a movie recently, I think it was Iron Man, and there were several small children and babies in the theater. And we saw a late show, so these kids would have been heading home well after midnight. At one point a little one started saying, "It's scary. I'm scared Mommy." And the parents still did not take the kid out of there.

And that was not an isolated incident. It seems to happen everytime we are at a late show. Do people think the kids will just fall asleep in there, that the THX surround sound will lull them off to dreamland? Why does theater managment allow this to happen?

It's a mystery, I guess.

OK, ranting over.

[BusyDad]

Sad on so many levels. Sad that this kid's parents (3???) just let him to his own devices. Sad that an adult with a kid who is obviously not their own is more readily seen by the general public as a potential molester/threat than someone trying to help. Despite that, I would have stayed with the kid too. If anything, just to provide some social interaction that he obviously never gets as one of the "children of the theater."

[bekah]

wow i have no idea.

[Red Flashlight]

I would have called the police.
As soon as possible.
Twice.