Ya'll don't even know. So I'm going to tell you.
After asking for people to step up and offer to guest post for me while I'm gone, I received a fair number of "I would love to do it but there's no way you would want a small-time blogger like me tanking your stats." I'm paraphrasing. Now here comes the "ya'll don't even know" part:
My stats stink.
There I said it. And in a minute I'm going to go one better and share them with you. I know talking about stats is about as distasteful as talking about money, but I have a point. By the way, it's too late for anyone to back out of the guest posting job now that you are about to find out that my blog smells like cheese and old lady farts.
Let me back up a second, though... Woah. Peee-eeeewww! You should never back up through old lady farts.
I was talking to a fancy pants blogger recently and we got onto the subject of blog statistics. Who knows how, because talking about blog stats makes my stomach weak and then, well, there you get your old lady farts. (I'm trying to break a record for using that phrase, apparently. Now must make it post title.) In any case, we started talking about audience size and blog promotion and other bloggy things.
This Bad MoFo (but totally modest) blogger stated that her approach to all things bloggoly is to forget the inconsequentials and just write. Don't sweat audience size or stats. What's the point, anyway? To become famous on the internet? That is, quite literally, a joke.
Write and write well and your audience will find you. Or not. But write anyway.
Yes, it would be fabulous to become famous writers. Yes, it would be wonderful to have 72 comments for every post we deign to share with the world. But what are the odds? Actually, I'm sure someone out there could very specifically tell me the odds, but I'm guessing they aren't good. So we reexamine our priorities.
Community. That is what sits at the top of my list. Not surprisingly, that is what sat at the top of Mrs. Fancy Pants Blogger's list, too. Easy for her to say, right, but it doesn't matter. I noticed a comment she left for an admirer the other day, responding to a comment that said something along the lines of "I'm flattered that you noticed me." Mrs. Bad MoFo responded with (again, paraphrasing) "...but you and I are the same." Aaaah, and we get to the crux of the matter.
The best part of blogging for me (so far, as I'm still waiting on previously mentioned fame and fortune) is finding other people that are quite like me. Regardless of popularity. Regardless of writing style. Finding people with whom I can relate. People who are sharing stories that resonate with me.
It is this sense of community that I am learning to embrace and encourage within my self. Recognizing that I write for myself, but I write to you.
Which brings me back around to stats. Audience size. Number of
comments. Blah blah blah. I totally think about this stuff. I do. I
absolutely worried that my BlogRhet piece would die a horribly silent
death with no comments and tank the BlogRhet stats. I feel you
self-proclaimed potential-tankers. Each time I received an email
saying that you'd like to guest post but don't think you are "good
enough" (which is a laugh), I totally felt you
r boobs. So I decided to show you my ass stats.
This was not actually my idea, though. Aside from all of you that have discussed your Technorati ranking before, I StumbledUpon an article this morning that had been Stumbled by Passionate America, whose other blog, Passionate Blogger, I link to in my Google Share frequently. (edited to add that his most recent post regarding Website Grader is relevant to this post and completely worth checking out. I ran the report he suggests and it's fascinating. I wish I had seen that post before I wrote this one, would have saved myself a lot of time and work!)
The post I StumbledUpon through Passionate America was 5+1 Golden Things Your Blog Can Earn By Posting Stats by Blogging Tune. The points covered have more to do with SEO stuff and advertising advantages than are of concern to me at the moment, but I saw a greater point about community when I clicked on the stats he had previously posted himself. Although his traffic is much higher than my own, I could actually compete with some of his other statistics.
Why does this matter? It doesn't, other than to say that I found myself relating to him. Whereas moments before I was thinking that he clearly had no idea what it meant to be a small-time hustler like me. I mean, it's hard out here for a pimp.
Which made me think of those emails I received this week. Which made me think of you. Not you highfalutin' bloggers, but you. We're all in the same boat. It's unstable and crowded and now stinks of old lady farts, but we are in it together. If you are reading this, then you are probably blogging for the same reasons I am. You and I are just the same. Holla!
So to all of my upcoming guest posters, this is where I burst your bubble and reveal that you probably won't gain fame and fortune by posting on this here blog. You might not even get double-digit comments. But you can have a raucous good time. And the only way to tank this blog is to keep it silent.
Now, with one swift blow of the Technorati hatchet, I hopefully end some of your hesitation and inhibitions. I humbly present to you, the blog stats for Velveteen Mind:
- Technorati Authority: 52 (although this one would be higher if ya'll would please stop linking to my old Typepad address and use www.velveteenmind.com instead :P)
- Technorati Rank: 112,760
- Feedburner Subscribers: 84 (fluctuates by about 10 every day)
- Ave. Visitors Per Day: 136
- Ave. Page Views Per Day: 217
- Google Page Rank: 2 (out of 10, ouch!)
- Old Lady Fart Rank: 5 (in this one post alone, not to be confused with Heather's overall Fart Authori-tay)
I've been blogging on and off since January 2007, having begun posting more regularly around then end of March.
All that being said, ya'll be sure to leave lots of comments for my guest bloggers and make them feel right at home! Meaning, talk a lot of smack just like ya'll do to me. And lurkers, this would be the perfect time for you to delurk!
Tomorrow I'll post about the two year anniversary of Hurricane Katrina. Then, when I get back from vacation (all I ever wanted!) it will be time for my 100th post! There's a party over here-- a party over there-- Wave your hands in the air-- Shake your derriere!