I went deep today. Deeper than I've ever gone before. Deep... into the blogosphere. Ha! Okay, so I clicked my way as far into blogland as you can go with about 60 consecutive minutes in which to work. That's about 45 more minutes than I'm used to, so I took advantage of the opportunity. Both boys were taking naps at the same time (a rare event here), so I went a little click-happy. This is what I discovered:
1. I'm not a big fan of blogging. (cont'd)
I don't like the terms blog,blogging,blogger,blogosphere, etc. nor the type of content to which they tend to refer. I much prefer writing, and there is a distinct difference.
It doesn't take long at all to determine if a site is filled with blogging or writing. The ones that are more about blogging are those mundane "here is a list of everything I did today and not one thing is funny or interesting but I'm going to list every last thing, including transcripts of every conversation I had with every person that even I consider to be boring." These tend to have new entries every day.
They really are writing just to write, which I consider to be just blogging. They also tend to include a great deal of posts about blogging, which is a sort of heightened self-awareness that just makes me uncomfortable. Yes, I recognize that I'm doing that very thing right now, but I have to get this out so that I can (hopefully) move on.
2. I don't like self-proclaimed writers that have yet to be published or "discovered."
If you tell me you are an aspiring writer or that you are a writer (but just haven't been published yet, blah blah blah), I am probably not going to like your writing. Believe me, I totally understand loving to write, aspiring to be a writer, using a blog as a springboard for your writing, and hoping that your writing will be magically discovered. However, I realized repeatedly today that if your shameless transparency makes me uncomfortable, your writing probably stinks.
I came upon so many bloggers today that just gushed about their writing aspirations, how they were working up to quitting their job or have just quit their job in order to write full time, but their posts were just embarrassing. I would think, "okay, they are just excited and didn't spell check or proofread," but then every post that followed was simply lame. One girl had recently quit her job in order to write full time, based entirely on her blog efforts so far, and every single post was just drivel.
Again, it's that self-aware thing. That blogging about blogging and writing as though it is just a given that you are good. Ugh. I really believe I stumbled upon the blogging equivalent of the early stages of American Idol auditions. You wonder, "who is telling them that they are good? Why isn't anyone helping them?"
Just call me Simon. That's who I was today. Megan with an English accent muttering, "Don't quit your day job."
And no, I don't think that I am just that good, but I'm also not writing post after post about how I'm planning on writing full time soon based on my SiteMeter stats. I'd like to maintain some illusion for myself that this really is just an extension of my original journaling habits. Site stats and comment counts be damned.
3. I don't like Technorati.
I've been resistant to using Technorati tags all along. I've been trying to embrace it, I really have, but I just can't do it, yet. The idea is that more people will discover your blog based on their interests, boiled down into these little tag words or phrases that should reflect your content. Any key words not used in your title or categories, you identify as tags. More understandable to me, choose terms and phrases that identify concepts within the content that may not necessarily show up in keyword hits. I understand the concept, but the execution is often not so pure.
Take a look at my last post, Red Noses for Polygamy. I hate the tags I used for that post. I was following all of the rules I had learned so far in Technorati articles, but I didn't like it. Sure, anyone looking for posts about Cirque du Soleil might find the post mildly interesting, but not someone searching "HBO." It's far-fetched that a polygamy-enthusiast (Big Love fan or not) would read beyond the first couple of paragraphs, either. No, it would just be another "what the hell is this" Google hit for them. Why would I even want them to find my site?
(I'm focusing on blogs that aren't relying on hit counts in an effort to build ad revenue.)
Again, the theory is that the more people that stumble upon your site, the better the odds that someone will find something they like and become a return reader. To increase your odds, you tag your little heart out and hope to entice as many blind stumbles as possible, even if the concept of your post is only very loosely related to their search terms. Sounds like the old bait and switch, when you get right down to it. I just don't see the point, yet.
For instance, do you realize how many people stumble upon my site every day after entering search phrases such as "does Beyonce have any kids" or "does Beyonce have an std" or (my favorite) "does Beyonce own any books?"
A while back, I included some lyrics by Beyonce as a humorous illustration of a point I was making about an anti-stay-at-home mothers book that had recently been published. I included Beyonce's name in the title of the post, without even thinking about it. Now I get all of these visitors that stay for less than ten seconds and certainly don't find what they want. Had I done that deliberately, what's the real benefit? What are the odds that these are readers that I would want and who would want me? Why bother? And yes, I realize that this post will draw them back, but believe me, they won't stay long.
There are all kinds of articles out there about "blackhat techniques" to manipulate search engine results, Technorati results, and social bookmarking sites. Stuff like hiding popular tags as text behind images. Why? Why do that? Do you really think you are going to get legitimate readers from that? People that are searching for entries about Sanjaya are going to stick around and enjoy your posts about how your husband won't wash the dishes?
This is my problem with Technorati. More specifically, the atmosphere Technorati has created. If you just want high hit numbers for ad revenue reasons, fine, but otherwise, it's just a mess.
And finally:
4. Anonymity is an illusion and it is my responsibility to protect my family.
I never used to use my name online. Not even my first name. I only shared photos on a private photo website, the address to which I only shared with family and friends and which I did not submit to any feeds or search engines. I was thoroughly convinced that stalkers were already looking for me, waiting for me to log on and slip up.
Then I started this blog and I lost my mind. I started using my family's names and posting their photos. My thinking was, "Well, real authors use their real names all the time. They do interviews and pose for photos with their families. This is nothing compared to that." Although I cringed just a little every time I wrote my sons' names, I still forged on; false sense of security intact.
Today, I became convinced of the errors of my ways. I came across numerous horror stories about the consequences of not protecting your identity as much as possible. I knew it! I knew better.
So from now on, no more names, other than my own. I'll continue to use my first name because I don't think I can undo the damage I've done there. I'll also still keep posting pictures, because I just can't help it. It's too much a part of my writing. Or my blogging. Whatever. Otherwise, I'm going to spend the next few days going through my old posts and changing the names of the innocent. It may be too late, but it doesn't matter.
As awkward as this feels right now, here goes:
- My 2 1/2 year old son will now be called Pants, as we used to call him Mr. Pee Pants when he was little. It was a variation on the Aqua Teen Hunger Force M.C. Pee Pants episode. We don't even watch that series, but we saw that episode and it stuck.
- My 9 month old baby boy will be called Cheeks, for fairly obvious and not-very-entertaining fat-baby-cheeks reasons.
- And finally, my husband will be called Maguire, in honor of one of his favorite movies, Jerry Maguire. Between his quoting the movie and the way our lives play out, I feel like I'm married to Jerry half the time, so it's only fitting.
So, hey, there's a day in the life of the Velveteen Mind. Actually, more like an hour. Mundane and rambling, all details intact. A massive "blogging about blogging" effort.
Look, I don't hide the fact that I like to write. I enjoy it. I've already gone into why I decided to keep a blog rather than a personal journal for now. Someday, sure, maybe I'd like to publish something. Who knows? But right now, I simply do not have the time, energy, stamina, or drive to be a writer. It's not that I'm afraid to put myself out there or afraid of others reading what I write. I've been writing for years. I'm comfortable with my writing. I enjoy sharing my writing, but on a small, manageable scale.
For now, however, it's all I can do to keep up with my current little empire located in our tiny little guest house. Large scale enterprises will have to wait.
Maybe it is that bald ambition in the blogs I found today that put me off. Embarrassed me on their behalf in the same way I'm embarrassed by those Day One American Idol auditions. It wasn't jealousy of their ambition, but rather some kind of empathetic protective instinct. Hell, you don't have to be a good writer to write. Just write. It's good for you. Just don't tell me that it's good for me, too. And don't try to trick me. Find me naturally, and I'll probably want to find you right back.
Oh, and the biggest thing I learned today? Keep your posts short and concise. Yeah, I'll work on that. One thing at a time.
At least I didn't share the transcripts of every conversation I had, though, huh?